More Murderabilia! Huzzah!

So. Check out what I had bought from Matt Dye. He is a screen printer.

Anyone know who this is?

THAT'S RIGHT!!!

IT'S THE BUNDY!!

That's Bundy looking unhappy super-imposed over Denise Naslund, one of his Lake Sammamish victims.

He's like, Hey, can you help me with my boat? Cuz, with this broken arm an' all....

AND THEY WENT WITH HIM.

Un-fucking-believable. 

Listen, they were even STILL ALIVE together. Like, he went and got ONE girl and then went back for the OTHER and then raped and killed them BOTH.

TELL ME that doesn't suck. 

You can't.

Cuz it totally does, is why.

Had to come back early from visiting Jara, which sucks cuz I wanted to swim...

I like being in the poooooools.

I'm just wondering if it makes a difference in the, ah... quality... of the rape/kill experience to have another girl there...? That sounds awful, but there you are... I mean, does it? I'm just trying to figure on a motive for that one, you know? I'd think it would be far too risky, in any case.

I will see Jaraface next week! I think. If he wants. w00t! I'm excited cuz I likes driving up and down from theres.

Jara drinky absinthe, Jara fall down!

Brother's Birthday, Fancy Trappist Ale and Debilitating Brain Aneurisms

yeah man! well now, instead of fancy trappist ale, i'm onto cosmopolitans FROM A BOTTLE that my mam bought. We're celebrating kev's birthday thats tomorrow n such... theyre low alcohol and it was socially obligatory so no get mad at caroline because i only had one and i'm proud o' myself for limiting.

so aaaahhh

only 6.9%, baby. thats like.... nothing. and mah dad drank all MY vodka so there.

well and whatever.

moose moose moose!

moosey moose cake! i hate you, north carolina! i cant think of a single thing worth saving there. everytime i hear news from there, its bad. those people always got shit to talk and fuck-all to do. O MIGHTY GOD, PLEASE STRIKE NORTH CAROLINA FROM THE MAP!! LET THERE BE NO SURVIVORS!!

For those that may be offended and yet don't know, most of my stupid immigrant family lives in north carolina and now they are hicks. i will go live with the others even tho they live in the old country and its cold there.

i could get cool coats tho.

i guess i'm gonna go smoke a hookah.

cuz i'm bored.

w00t

You know what? I'm just feeling soooo much shit I don't even know how to get that thing down on paper...

I'm just saying this: foodNetwork is AWESOME.

And ChiliPups are AWESOME. 

And I have BOTH so aaaaahhh being old school wit that shit.

I'm drunk, really.

XD

Drinking in Florence

Going to see Jara tomorrow.

He better not balls it up.

I better not balls it up!! 

Oh gosh, I can't wait to see him and show him my car! Its a convertible! I drive it intoxicated! Drunk driving is fun, guys!

See you in FLORENCE, sober drivers!!

AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

AAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!

Displayed by Most Suicide Victims

Well, our "serial killer" is dead. He was a lame-ass anyways.

I want that anime girl Rubiks cube that is UNMUSSED oh snap please dont muss it up, man.

Oh gosh!

What a pickle! 

I.... has a confession of some magnitude.

..... Whew... ok, this is tuff....

I... uh... listen to Taylor Swift.

....

I SAID IT!!!!

Don't JUDGE me, you JONAHS!

You need a weed aug. Weed aug?!

C'mon.

moshimoshi w00t daijoba desu-ca? whatevs with your heartcut

WE'RE GROWING APART OMG I'M SADDENED

.....

sigh

From Russia, Without Cash

got an call from my cousin natalya and shes all "come see us!" so i'm all "ok!" but really i dont have enough money to go to russia... if they FRONT me... ok, but i dont think they are.

theyre just tryin to show off their new soviet cars to my old used capitalist car...

listen... i love yall to death, guys and yall family n all but i aint got the funds..

call me.

BIG NUMBER 60, BABY, YEAH!

Ok this is my 60th post, bitches!

I am pleased to report that everything is GREAT right now!

I'm drunk, Jara's my friend and SC has a lame serial killer!

You may have seen him on the news- he's lame and shoots people- but to me he could just be a plain ol' robber that had to kill.

Listen, REAL serial killers kill manually, not with guns. They need to be there to see the light of life leave their victims eyes, to breathe in their last breath and if you're SHOOTING someone THAT DON'T HAPPEN, BABY.

Plus, there's no method to his madness. The best he could be is a spree killer. I mean, damn, even I have guns so that's no big. Besides, he would sooner go to Columbia than come here to Charleston.

I know why he's killing, it's because he's in the no-horse town of Gaffney.

Dammit, I'd kill too!

More to come...

The World Exists on a Turtle's Back

So, Jonathan Greensley, our last kitten, died. Everything sucks ass.

I'm outta alcohol.

Everything sucks.

I just want to get a hug from SOMEONE but there's no one.

Worst. July 4th. Ever.

Except, I'm making black 'n' bleu salads for dinner so that's yummy.....

XD

Gettin drunk, hoes.

Get To Dyson, Son! I mean, Dicin'!

Man, I keep drinkin'! I'm drinkin' right now! Mini bottles on the HOUSE baby, you know. I'm so sad about Michael Jackson... Man I'm sad about Jara not wanting to be my friend last night. That hasn't driven me to drinking tho, because Jara still is my friend. 

I miss you Jara.

I got you a present for being a great friend, even tho you dislike me and think that you're a bad friend.

I will see you in Florence and BOY will you be SURPRISED!!

Mini bottles, mini bottles

YOU SHUT UP OK?!?!

I like that Dr. Phil clip where he says, "Now, that's one skanky-ass crack whore." Aaaaahahahaha! Tell that bitch Dr. Phil!!

OMG we got like 4 pounds of bacon and I LOVE BACON.

I got it at Costco for $8, baby, you better believe it.

BELIEVE IT.

OMG I just read that Obama wants to FINE individuals and families who can't afford insurance $1,000+ if they don't partake in the national health plan!!

WHAT THE FUCK, OBAMA?!?!

I thought you were a man for the people but you're BLEEDING ME DRY, asshole!!!

If I don't have money for insurance what makes you think I have a thousand goddamn dollars with your name on it?!

COME AND GET IT, ASSHOLE, CUZ I GOT SOMETHING FOR YA THAT YOU AINT GONNA LIKE HALF AS WELL AS MONEY- A 5.56 TO THA FUCKING CHEST, BABY!!!!!

JUST TRY TO TAKE A GRAND FROM ME!!

TRY IT, ASS!!

You will be SORRY, I promise you!

I'm just sayin.... TRIPLE EDIT man like don't mix alcohols cuz thats STOOPID DX

Birthday Sess... Or Everyday Sex

Damn, I'm bored.

Someone needs to bother me or something so I'll have something to rant about.

I mean, me and Travis went to get some guitar strings and then we hung out at B&N a little bit and I met ANOTHER hot guy cuz I'm on FIYAH and we watched a load ass of porn and shit...

One thing led to another aaaand.... WOW!

Well.

But now I'm damn well bored and smoking this traitor's hookah and well... I think I will abandon it and go drink because drinking is what makes me happy.

Then I'll drive my little car.

Kids, don't try this at home unless your parents aren't there. ;D

God, I'm becoming an alcoholic.  I always had kind of a high tolerance but.... this is fuckin amazing what I've come up with now. When I'm NOT drinking, I'm irritable!

WTF, vodka?

How you gonna betray me like that?

Go here --> www.fakku.net

It's VERY nsfw, so don't let your mom catch you, baby.

I guess that's all I have for right now... I might come back and blog more when I'm buzzed, so watch out.